If you are rich, be thankful that you are spared the narrow cares of poverty.
If you are poor, be thankful that you are not exposed to the temptations of wealth.
If you are dull, be thankful that you are not one of those conceited fellows who think they know everything.
If you are ugly, be thankful that beauty is but skin deep.
If your friend is lucky, and makes much money by speculation, thank heaven that you earn your living honestly.
If your fellow clerk gets promoted, you should be thankful that you, at least, don't owe your advancement to favoritism or partiality.
If you break your arm, be thankful that you did not break your leg.
If you break your leg, be thankful that your head is still whole.
If you break your neck, be thankful that you have at least finished your journey through the barren desert of life.
If you recover from a severe illness, be thankful that you are spared to your friends a little while longer.
If your husband dies, be thankful that you are yet young enough to catch another.
If your wife runs away with another man, be thankful that you have at least found her out.
If you meet with a narrow escape in a railroad accident, be thankful that a special providence preserved you, although twenty or thirty better men lost their lives.
If you are fat, be thankful that you can keep warm in cold weather.
If you are lean, be thankful that you can keep comfortable when the thermometer is in the nineties.
If you have no place to sleep nights, be thankful that the streets are well lighted.
If you are sent to the workhouse, be thankful that you have steady employment.
If you have no money, no home, no reputation, no prospects,—be thankful that you at least have life, and while there is life there is hope.
In short, as St. Paul puts it, "in everything give thanks." You can scarcely get into a condition where you cannot conceive of something worse, and by looking at the bright side of things, you will always find something to be thankful for.